Inservice is over.
This is my last "free" weekend.
Here it comes!
I love school. So much. I loved it when I was in elementary school, but I especially love being the teacher. It's incredible how comfortable I am with it. I remember (the whole one semester) when I was a music major I would just cry myself to sleep every night because I was so miserable. It just didn't make sense to me--I loved music so much and wanted to teach kids to love it just like I did. But it was just SO wrong. Everything about it was wrong and felt wrong, and that was weird because I had never felt like that about music before.
I spent the next semester taking generals because I had no idea what I wanted to do with myself. It was easy for me to rule out things I didn't want to do; it was unbelievably difficult for me to come up with majors I'd be ok with. Out: math anything, science anything, music anything, health anything, art anything. Possibilities: English ed, horticulture, or el ed. I decided I couldn't do English ed because (looking at McKenzie's stuff) I knew it would be just like the music thing over again. I looked into horticulture quite a bit, not necessarily because that's what I was really interested in, but I felt like elementary education was just SUCH a cop out major at BYU-Idaho. I felt that EVERY girl that was in el ed was just out to get married and that it was an easy major for people who were unwilling to do anything more difficult. I'm really ashamed to say that, but that's seriously how I felt. At that point in my life I really wanted to pursue a career seriously (after a mission, of course), and I did NOT plan on getting married, so I didn't want to get into a major where that's how people would see me.
I thought and prayed and thought and prayed some more. By the time registration came around I still didn't have any idea what I wanted to do. I just got on and registered for el ed classes as a cop out. Really. I thought, "Well, I don't know that I want to do this, but I'll take some classes so I don't get too far behind and they'll be easy, so it doesn't matter." I didn't take any horticulture classes, even though I wanted to--they just didn't fit in my schedule. Hah--I don't even remember what I took that semester! That's when Emily was there with me....so that was, what? History and Philosophy of Education...huh. I don't remember what else. But guess what? It didn't take me that long to get my answer. Everything just felt right. I felt so comfortable, good about myself, and good about where it would take me. I hadn't even been with any students yet--but I just knew that I was in the right spot.
I can probably count on one hand the number of times that I've felt so absolutely positive about a decision that I had no hesitation about moving forward with it. My entire experience in the elementary education program at BYU-Idaho has been one of those times. I still constantly receive affirmation that I'm diong the right thing and going in the right direction.
Now I'm finishing up that education and am going forward--w00t w00t! True, I'm still a "teacher candidate" during student teaching--I'm still learning how to be a teacher--but I get to be the teacher. I really must be on the right path too, because I keep getting seriously blessed in my endeavors to be a teacher. Senior practicum--5th grade--social studies unit on the Revolutionary War--um, yes PLEASE!! My favorites of everything. My teacher, Mrs. Marquez, was absolutely perfect for me. She was such a fabulous mentor and taught me so much about being a good teacher. She also became a close friend. We both went through some personal issues through the semester and I couldn't have been more grateful to be able to work with her though everything--she helped me be the optimistic (and probably naive) teacher I want to be, while understanding the realities that I was dealing with as well. For my student teaching I'm expecting all of that again with Mrs. Nyborg--she just seems like the sweetest lady ever and I know that I have the opportunity to learn so much from her. Oh, and I'm in 6th grade. Does the Lord love me? Yes. Yes He does. He knows I would have just died had I been in a younger class. He also blessed me with a great school where all the teachers want to help me succeed. The principal, Mr. Keller, is so supportive and wants to help us. He told me today that he knew he wanted me at his school as soon as I interviewed because he wanted me with Mrs. Nyborg. He even had to fight over me with another principal! :D That really brightened my day.
I want to be a good teacher. A master teacher. I really want to teach, too. Let me tell you that I soon learned that el ed is not an easy major. I mean, sure--ANYONE can be a mediocre teacher. But it is not easy to be a good teacher. It takes a lot of hours and a lot of work and a lot of continuous learning, and I'm still working on all of that. But I really want it. I want to teach, and I have every intention of doing something with my degree. I'm not sure yet (with this economy and what's happening in Idaho education) that I'll teach, but I'll be a parapro or something. I will work with children. I will learn from those children. It's all I want to do. Someday, I'll get to work with and learn from my own children, but I'll practice on other peoples' first. :)
I know this is a lot of serious/boring/feely stuff, but that's all I've been thinking about lately. I know the Lord will take you where you need to be if you just LISTEN and DO. I know that--everything from my major to my husband--every decision I have made has gone through Him, and that's how I know they're all good ones--and the best decisions I could have made.
So. My 6th graders come on Monday. Bring it on!
